"Cat" replies

How about a hearty laugh for your Monday morning?

Yesterday's "Too stupid to breathe" honoree, whom I've called "Cat," replied when I notified her that I'd commemorated her idiocy with a blog post. And here is that timeless, incisive, cutting reply, reproduced exactly as sent:

Since you had a reading comprehension problem with my support statement, I will talk to you as if we were in a bar (which IM sure you frequent often). I will provide you with run on sentences, no paragraphs and as many misspelled words as possible so you can understand me. Though you do reveal a respect for my statement IM sure your not smart enough to understand (copied my statement from someone else is a compliment dopey). Whew, you are such an angry little socialist! Of course I have not done a scientific poll, but that is all I ever observe from those of the extreme left wing, intolerance, profanity, violence and no room at the inn for anyone different. Of course, that is how all socialist governments operate. Your attitude towards others with a different opinion would serve you well in many countries run by dictators! Such intolerance for a mere statement of opinion of a fellow American, thank God you and I are not in one of those countries, IM sure you would have me shot for voicing my opinion? I thought you leftist were all for tolerance? And the profanity only serves to show what you really are, you might reconsider using it as it shows a moron out of control! This is all I have to say to you as facts would only serve to bore you. IM sure you get your facts from one of your tolerant leftist web sites. I will conclude in stating one fact, you are the definition of a liberal elitist snob, not to mention IQ challenged. The facts for this is that you have no idea who I am and you have no idea what gender I am. And to insult the masses that shop at Walmart, well what does that say about you my little friend?
I would have voted for Hillary, but noooooo, so you get comrade Obama from the corrupt Chicago political machine. BTW, just one other current fact genius, it is the congress that is passing the bailout act, the president merely signs it or not when it gets to his desk, whew! Understand one thing, a liberal socialist will never be elected in this country. The Dem's need to wake up and smell the Democracy! See ya Donkey elitist liberal banana head!

All I can say is, thanks for proving my point. And so, here's an open letter to Cat:

---

Dear Cat:

Everything you said was pretty much precisely the opposite of what one would say in an actual debate. Your spelling and grammar, Cat, reveal you to be exactly what I surmised you were: an undereducated, underinformed Wal-Mart shopper. Frankly, I'm surprised you even know how to turn on your computer, let alone actually send e-mails. (Then again, that does put you one step ahead of Huggy Bear.) And as for insulting Wal-Mart shoppers, I'm referring more to the mouth-breathing morons who think Wal-Mart is the end-all and be-all of existence and who contribute to the degradation of our economy and culture by giving them more and more money to pump into right-wing causes.

You have got to be kidding me regarding the bailout! The facts are that it's being proposed by the Bush crime syndicate through the Secretary of the Treasury, Henry Paulson, and while it's true that Congress has to pass it first, that doesn't help your position, because I think the Democrats in Congress have capitulated (that means "given in," Cat) to pretty much everything the Republicans have wanted for the last two years and, therefore, the Democrats in Congress, especially the leadership, are just about as incompetent as "your" president and "your" candidate.

What's so wrong with socialism, by the way? Your president and his advisors are embracing it wholeheartedly today! Good thing Obama's no socialist, though -- if he were, he wouldn't have voted for FISA, among other things, and for that matter, he'd never have been nominated. Socialism as an economic theory has its advantages -- the problem is that people like you think that anything that helps the less fortunate through the federal government is "socialist." Get a grip and emerge from your Limbaugh-soaked imagery long enough to recognize what and who really is "socialist" ...

IQ-challenged? I don't even know where to go from there. If you only knew ... Oh, and regarding "elitist," to paraphrase Jon Stewart, I thought "elite" meant "good?" And as for the profanity, well, welcome to my blog. Proudly uncivil. Sometimes profanity is the only way to respond cogently to idiots like you. And just to correct one typo -- when you said "socialism" embraced intolerance and violence and "no room at the inn for anyone difference," obviously you meant "fascism," as in what the Republicans advocate.

Sure you would have voted for Hillary. Did you vote for her in the Democratic primary? If not, kindly shut the fuck up and keep your lies to yourself.

Oh, and of course I wouldn't have you shot for voicing your opinion. I'm extremely tolerant, actually. You're perfectly entitled to screech your nutjob tirades from the mountaintops for all I care. Just stop sending them to me in my e-mail.

Love,
Donkey elitist liberal banana head

P.S. I hope you'll call in to my radio show this afternoon. I'd love to hear from you and even debate you on the air.

P.P.S. You wrote, and I quote verbatim, "Though you do reveal a respect for my statement IM sure your not smart enough to understand (copied my statement from someone else is a compliment dopey)." Don't ever lecture me about reading comprehension and writing skill. Seriously. Learn to write English.

P.P.P.S. When I cast my vote for Barack Obama in November, thereby cancelling out your own, I'll be thinking of you. And laughing.