Today's Daily Schadenfreude: Ed Heeney

Well, this is just too fucking bad.

Right-wing nutjob Ed Heeney, who is perhaps best known for his anti-gay rants on The Daily Show in 2004 (see below), was passed over for the GOP nomination in Florida's 27th Senate District, a seat currently held by Democrat (and my Facebook friend) Dave Aronberg. And poor, trod-upon Ed is calling shenanigans on the Republican Party.

"My party betrayed me," Heeney said Tuesday. "They decided to put a spoiler from the west coast on the day of the deadline."

District 27 encompasses both coasts.

"I'm not stupid enough to split a vote in a primary and then get the east coast fighting against the west coast," Heeney said.

But he said he would have been the stronger candidate against Aronberg.

"I don't have any clue what the hell (Caldwell) stuck his nose in for," Heeney said. "This kid, he's going to get flipped around like a biscuit. He won't get 42 percent. It's a waste of time."

[...]

"If I investigate and find out certain contingency of people suckered me into dropping out, I will put the flag up, and there will be some noise flying on every talk show," Heeney said. "I'm going to unload 162 poems on society on five Web pages at once simultaneously."

Aronberg was surprised that Heeney dropped out but said he already was expecting to face Caldwell in the general election.

Obviously, Heeney is pretty unhinged. Can you blame local Republicans for booting Heeney from the race? Granted, the Republican candidate, whether Heeney or Caldwell, wasn't likely to oust Aronberg, a popular, Harvard-educated incumbent who at the tender age of 37 is likely to be a force in Florida politics for years to come. But if you're the GOP in a year when you already face historic electoral losses at all levels of government (this is me playing the world's smallest violin), do you want to have as your standard-bearer in a tough race someone who says things like Heeney has?

Ed Heeney says he’s not homophobic, just "homo-nausic."

Heeney, a Republican candidate for state representative in Palm Beach County’s District 88 [in 2004], has been complaining about "militant" homosexuals and their influence in American culture. He says he’s just "sick of the bastards."

Heeney’s antics landed him an appearance on Comedy Central’s "The Daily Show with Jon Stewart" on Aug. 2[, 2004].

During the segment, Heeney said he was "sick of the influx of homosexual culture," according to Matt O’Brien, producer of the "Daily Show." Heeney also complained about the proliferation of lesbian bars in Fort Lauderdale, saying it had hindered his ability to shoot pool, O’Brien said.

[...]

Heeney says lesbians are "more militant than gay men." He then referred to a bad experience he had a couple of years ago while playing pool against a lesbian team.

At the time, Heeney was a member of the Gold Coast Pool League, which organizes matches between bars and nightclubs. He was playing for Brownies Bar, which he described as "an industrial downtown redneck bar." Heeney’s team was playing against J’s bar, a local lesbian establishment.

"Being a farmer, it was an interesting culture clash to observe," Heeney said.

Things soon turned ugly, he said. Heeney claims a "semi-straight white male" on J’s team tried to burn his hand with a cigarette. Heeney then knocked the cigarette out of the man’s hand with a cue stick, he said. According to Heeney, the lesbians then "ganged up" on him.

The incident inspired Heeney to write a "17-page treatise" on lesbians making it difficult for straight men to play pool in a pool league, Heeney said.

"They’re trying to take over the pool league by intimidation," Heeney said.

Heeney says the lesbian insurgency has also left him behind the eight ball in his love life. He says it’s hard to find straight women to date in South Florida, and when he does manage to persuade a gal to go out with him, she ends up being hit on by a lesbian.

"Everywhere I go, if I have a good-looking girl with me, she ends up being hit on by a cow," Heeney said.

Epic fail, as the kids say ... I mean, what a fucking idiot. (See below for video clip.)

What is it with the nutjob homophobes and closet cases in Fort Lauderdale*? If there's a more ridiculous, creepy pair of shitbags out there than Feeney Heeney and Jim Naugle, I'd prefer not to meet them, thank you very much.

So, the GOP abandoned an obvious idiot, whose more recent deranged rants (unrelated to gay culture) you can catch on YouTube if you want to kill some brain cells. Good riddance, say I. But, hey, Ed, at least you can console yourself with one small honor, because today's Blast Off! Daily Schadenfreude is for you!

UPDATE (2:21 pm 7/16/08): Heeney's Blogger profile notes that his interests include "finding a straight white girl in South Florida that wants to rock the world" and that he claims to have appeared in the feature films Wild Things, There's Something About Mary, Holy Man, and Out of Sight. Just thought I'd bring that to your attention ...

Also, I found the Daily Show clip:



UPDATE (11:22 am 8/16/08): Talk about a Freudian slip. As pointed out in Comments (including one purportedly by Heeney himself), I conflated Ed Heeney with fellow wingnut shitbag Tom Feeney. I've corrected my error, which was merely one of spelling, not of sentiment.

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* Actually, although the pool-playing incident occurred in Fort Lauderdale, Heeney lives in Boynton Beach. So do I. This presents me with a dilemma: if I ever run into the guy, do I cockpunch him or merely mock him mercilessly? Decisions, decisions ...

Jim Naugle: merely an asshole, or the biggest asshole in politics?

I'm not sure what the next item on the "gay agenda" is (Jeebus, I hate that expression), but freakishly bigoted Fort Lauderdale mayor Jim Naugle (right) had a few words to say this morning to local hate radio station WFTL* about the possibility that his successor -- he leaves office this year thanks to term limits -- might be gay. Two openly gay candidates, Dean Trantalis and Earl Rynerson, are in the race to replace the hateful douchebag.

Here's a transcript of Naugle's conversation (.mp3) with WFTL hosts Russ Morley and Michael Woulfe, starting at about 2:05 into the audio. You will not believe what this fucking idiot Naugle says. Seriously.

MORLEY: Let's talk about your legacy here for a second. How long have you been the mayor of Fort Lauderdale?

NAUGLE: I've been mayor for -- I'm in my 18th year, and on the [city] commission I'm in my 24th year.

MORLEY: Your 18 years as mayor of Fort Lauderdale -- obviously a very popular candidate, winning reelection year after year ...

NAUGLE: Well, many years no one really wanted the job, so ...

[laughter]

WOULFE: Who could blame 'em?

MORLEY: And a courageous guy at that. So, you talk about -- I know you're not the president of the United States, but you've been a good mayor of Fort Lauderdale, represented the city well, and you talk about "legacy" -- do you want to be remembered as the guy who said "No gay sex in public restrooms?" That's the only thing you're gonna be remembered by?

NAUGLE: Well, you know, I would like to be remembered as one of the first politicians who rejected political correctness and did what's right, and I think that as time goes on, more and more -- you know, political correctness can have deadly consequences, and that's what happening in Broward County, where county elected officials are ignoring the problems, the explosion that we've had in new cases of AIDS among men having sex with men, and they're ignoring that out of political correctness because they don't want to get the rap of the radical gay lobby.

And ... but I've been willing to stand up and say, hey, look, this is a problem, people are dying. It's a very costly disease, and we've been reducing activity in our parks and public places in the city. We've made arrests, we've gotten the county Convention and Visitors Bureau to quit spending tax dollars attracting visitors to the bathhouses, so -- no, I think being remembered as someone that didn't let political correctness get in the way of doing the right thing is a pretty good legacy.

WOULFE: Hear, hear!

MORLEY: But on the other hand, you know, you're also being viewed as anti-gay, especially with the remark about gay people not being happy, or not being "gay," that they're unhappy, and things like that ...

NAUGLE: Well, you know, that remark was not made, and it was ...

MORLEY: Was not made at all?

NAUGLE (continuing): It was printed by a reporter at the Sun-Sentinel who has a history of taking things out of context and misquoting, and what I did say was that I use the term -- I prefer to use the term "homosexual" instead of the Sun-Sentinel-approved word "gay," and they made a big deal out of that.

But I've had calls and letters and e-mails of support from many members of the homosexual community that say, Jim, you're absolutely right, it's disgusting that men would go to a park and perform sex acts in front of children, and many -- I have many supporters in the homosexual community that reject this kind of behavior.

MORLEY: Well, you know, Jim, you're not the first person I've heard say that -- 'cause we're all three old enough here, Mike and I and you are all three old enough to remember that the term "gay" used to mean "happy" at one point in time, and how the male homosexuals got "gay" and the women got "lesbian" I'll never know. I guess they get first pick.

NAUGLE: And the poor people on that island in Greece that have to put up with that ...

MORLEY: And "gay Paree!" I mean, is the whole city homosexual? I don't think so. All right, let's ask you this here this morning ...

NAUGLE: Well, back to the two gentlemen running for mayor. I think that a homosexual does have a chance to be elected mayor in Fort Lauderdale, if they reject that notion that it's okay to take over our parks and public places with that kind of activity -- I mean, if a responsible homosexual can run for office and reject that kind of activity, if a responsible homosexual were to run for office and do something about the AIDS crisis here, recognizing that promiscuous activity has a heavy, you know, cost on human life and dollars, I think that they would have a chance to be elected.

MORLEY: Jim, we're running out of time here this morning -- tell us, when's your last day as mayor?

NAUGLE (laughing): Oh, some day in March -- I think it might be March 16th or 17th, somewhere in there.

MORLEY: Oh, that far away? Oh, great!

NAUGLE: No countdown clock.

MORLEY: All right. Always a pleasure to talk to you. Mayor Jim Naugle, Fort Lauderdale's mayor, on News-Talk 850 WFTL.

I find it difficult to believe that there can be a bigger assclown in any elected office anywhere (well, outside of Washington, D.C., at least) than this lunatic Jim Naugle. His endless, creepy obsession with gay life and AIDS and the ridiculous perception that all gay men (and, presumably, only gay men) are promiscuous would be hilarious if it weren't so deranged.

A typical disgusting conservative shit-for-brains, Naugle conveniently ignores facts, or contorts the facts so grossly that they are barely recognizable, all to justify his skewed, backwards, fascist worldview. Regarding the gay/happy mess, here's how the Sun-Sentinel originally reported it a year ago:

"The homosexual newspaper said it's the 'gay parking lot.' That's not me saying that," Naugle said in the interview, "that's what they said. I don't use the word 'gay.' I use the word 'homosexual.' Most of them aren't gay. They're unhappy."

Yes, Jim, as you pointed out today, you use the word "homosexual" instead of "gay." But you also explained why you do that, you dumb cretin: because they're not "gay," they're "unhappy." As for the "poor people on that island in Greece," I guess you're referring to Lesbos, and guess what, Jimbo? The word "lesbian" really comes from Lesbos, you stupid fuck!

What's a "responsible homosexual," Jim? And how do you define "political correctness?" If it means "respecting all people despite their differences with me," then I guess you can count me as "politically correct," too -- of course, I prefer to think of it as "being a decent human being and member of society," which would pretty much count you out.

And, Jim, do you have any idea that AIDS hasn't been a "gay man's disease" since, like, the 1980s?! As of June 2008, "men who have sex with men" accounted for barely a third of HIV/AIDS cases in Broward County (PDF) -- did you know that? No, of course not, because who gives a shit about facts, right? Not only that, Jim, but according to Broward County's own statistics (PDF), the incidence of AIDS has decreased among males (by percentage vs. females) over the last ten years:

click image for larger version

No, Jim, all of this would be news to you because you're just an ignorant asshole.

Look, I realize I'm an uncivil lefty blogger, but I don't normally spew invective like this even against the worst offenders in the Bush crime syndicate. There's just something about the visceral hate that Jim Naugle has for certain segments of society (not just gays) that makes me truly, deeply angry. I'll celebrate when he leaves office -- and thereby leaves public life for good.

P.S. Fuck you too, Russ Morley and Michael Woulfe.

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* WFTL's lineup rogues' gallery includes Dr. Laura, Bill O'Reilly, Michael "Savage" Weiner, Laura Ingraham, and Dennis Miller, plus a whole gang of local wingnut assholes.

Today's Daily Schadenfreude: Jim Naugle

It's been a while since we've talked about Fort Lauderdale's batshit crazy, virulently anti-gay, intolerant assface mayor, Jim Naugle.

Even though he's term-limited and, fortunately for the city, can't run again for mayor, Naugle must be crapping himself (figuratively, one hopes) at the prospect of a gay mayor. But that has become a distinct possibility, with the reported entry in the race by Fort Lauderdale's first and only openly gay city commissioner.

Dean Trantalis confirmed that he will run for mayor in the March 2009 election. Trantalis had been vague about his political intentions earlier this week, although a board member of the gay political group Dolphin Democrats said Trantalis told him he planned to run for mayor.

Trantalis served on the City Commission between 2003 and 2006. He decided not to run for a second term, citing dysfunction on the commission and the need to spend more time at his law practice.

Trantalis' entry into the race has not drawn cheers from all gay political leaders because some had already agreed to support City Commissioner Cindi Hutchinson, an ally of the gay community. Michael Albetta, a Dolphin Democrats board member, and Stephen Gaskill, a gay political consultant, have already pledged to support Hutchinson.

The Dolphin Democrats as an organization doesn't endorse candidates, but their board members have political clout in the community.

Both Hutchinson and Trantalis publicly criticized Mayor Jim Naugle last year when he angered the gay community by making comments about gay sex in park bathrooms.

Oh, poor Jim. How will he ever carry on his campaign of hate and bigotry if he's not mayor anymore? Ooh, I know: maybe Fox News can hire him as a commentator! He'd fit in perfectly with their latest hire, Mike Huckabee.

Don't worry, Jimbo. Sure, you might have to attend the swearing-in of a dirty, nasty, gay successor, but at least you'll always have the honor of being a five-time winner here ... because, for a fifth time, today's Blast Off! Daily Schadenfreude is for you!

Today's Daily Schadenfreude: Jim Naugle

Batshit crazy gay-hating Fort Lauderdale mayor Jim Naugle is in the news again. The city yanked his column (no euphemism intended) in a regular city publication.

City Commissioner Cindi Hutchinson brought up the column this week at a city meeting, and her colleagues agreed that the mayor's missives should not be carried in the taxpayer funded magazine. They told City Manager George Gretsas to make the changes.

Hutchinson reminded Mayor Jim Naugle of a resolution the group passed in September embracing diversity. That resolution, approved Tuesday, was intended as a public salve during a controversy over the mayor's comments that public restrooms and parks are hookup sites for gay men, and that he uses the term "homosexual" rather than "gay" because many gays are not happy.

In his column in the city's latest Focus on Fort Lauderdale publication, he talked about finding a tourism Web site advertising a city park for men to meet for sex. He encouraged citizens to call if they witness such illegal activities.

"I just want all this nonsense to stop," said Hutchinson, who is running for Naugle's open seat in 2009.

Naugle declined to apologize and said that he, too, "was outraged," because he wrote it in October "when all of that was timely."

However, Naugle brought up the same sex-in-parks issue just last month in his State of the City address.

This, kids, is what is known as "obsession." Naugle can't stop thinking about men having sex in public places, and so he can't stop talking about it. Note also that Naugle not only didn't apologize, he didn't not apologize; that is, he didn't even bother to give one of those Standard Wingnut Apologies™ like "I'm sorry if my statements offended anyone."

This guy is sick. I mean, not just wrong -- he's genuinely deranged. How shocking is it, especially in a purportedly gay-friendly city, that this guy actually got elected mayor? Jim Naugle disgusts me, and he should disgust all sentient beings anywhere. I'm appalled to think that it's going to take till 2009 to get this guy out of office and, we can hope, back into well-deserved obscurity. Until then, I guess he can just remain anonymous under his hood.

In the meantime, congratulations, Mayor Naugle, you abominable, festering piece of shit. Today's Blast Off! Daily Schadenfreude is for you!

Jim Naugle update

Some of you across America's Wang™ and around the country or beyond might be wondering what is going on with Florida's favorite batshit crazy homophobic mayor, Jim Naugle of Fort Lauderdale.

When last we checked in with the intolerant goatfucker mayor, he was being kicked off the Broward County Tourism Development Council board. Still, he's the target of letters to the editor and newspaper articles just about every day.

A week ago, Elaine Schulze of Fort Lauderdale made headlines with her banner in support of the bigoted shitstain mayor. Reading "Thank you Mayor Naugle From the Children of Fort Lauderdale," the banner hangs over Schulze's indoctrination camp day care, Small World.

A woman who tied a large banner on the side of her Victoria Park day-care center in a show of support for Mayor Jim Naugle's controversial comments about homosexuality says she has been ordered to take it down. But she's not going to, she told the South Florida Sun-Sentinel late Tuesday afternoon.

Elaine Schulze, of Small World daycare, said she was going to comply with the city's orders but decided not to, after getting swamped with phone calls about it.

"I will take my banner down when this city takes down all the rainbow flags," Schulze told the Sun-Sentinel.

[...]

"I guess I am not allowed to show appreciation for actions that are long overdue to protect the children and the ignorant," she told the Sun-Sentinel in an e-mail.

If you're trying to help out the ignorant, Ms. Schulze, you might want to look in the mirror first.

Meanwhile, other fundie fucktards area residents are voicing their support as well, through letters to the editor like this one:

God bless Jim Naugle. Militant gays and other far left groups love to attach the word "homophobic" to anyone who disagrees with them. Let me assure you that I (and I am certain that Jim Naugle) fear no man or earthly thing.

Furthermore, we do not hate anyone. On the contrary, if we claim to be Christian, we are compelled by God to love everyone in the same way that God loves us.

My argument with these radical gays, and some other groups who love to cry discrimination, is they demand special privileges, not equality. They insist that society put its stamp of approval on what most people would consider deviant or perverted behavior. The existing laws, in my opinion, are already adequate to protect the rights of everyone, as long as those laws are properly enforced.

God bless you, Jim Naugle. I know that you are not alone and I firmly believe that the majority of the people are on your side.

I really had no idea that the Religious Right had much of a foothold (or, as Ted Haggard might say, "asshold") in south Florida, but I'm being proven more and more wrong every day. Um, as to the assertions regarding "most people" and "the majority:" wrong and wrong. But when did fundies ever let facts get in the way of a good sermon?

Meanwhile, city commissioners in neighboring Wilton Manors will vote tonight on a resolution to denounce the homophobic comments made by the vomitous fucknozzle Mayor Naugle. As Wilton Manors' population is estimated to be 35-40% gay, it's safe to say the resolution is likely to pass.

Yet, everything I've been seeing, hearing, and reading lately suggests that the pestilential waste of flesh mayor is resolute in the face of all the criticism. Indeed, I'm quite sure we haven't heard the last of the cretinous, imbecilic asshole Mayor Naugle.

UPDATE (9:52 pm 9/11/07): Regrettably, I failed to give credit where credit is due. My inspiration for the incivility of this post comes from NTodd, who is to profanity what Rembrandt was to profanity.

I mean, art.

Oh boy, is this gonna be GREAT!

The fundies are coming! The fundies are coming!!

Right here in America's Glans™ on September 17! Better still, to the home of batshit crazy fundie mayor Jim Naugle!

A cornucopia of well-known wingers and bible beaters will be gathered in Fort Lauderdale ... to hold a “Values Voter Presidential Debate,” moderated by WingNutDaily’s Joseph Farah.

The is the forum that the Base has been looking forward to because it will be the one debate where candidates will surely get pinned down by the luminaries of the fringe-right movement on the party’s hypocrisy and waffling on social issues.

It's gonna be a cornucopia of schadenfreude as the candidates try to respond to questions from this band of wackos:

* Paul Weyrich, founder and president of the Free Congress Foundation
* Phyllis Schlafly, founder and president of Eagle Forum
* Don Wildmon of the American Family Association
* Judge Roy Moore, columnist at WND and head of the Foundation for Moral Law
* Rick Scarborough of Vision America
* Mat Staver of Liberty Counsel.

The usual suspects have RSVP'd yes, but they haven't heard back yet from front-runners Rudy and Mitt, nor from Saint John McCain or putative candidate Fred Thompson.

Of course, Rudy and the other candidates except for McCain already said they had scheduling conflicts with the September 16 Spanish-language debate in Miami. How curious that they can show up (well, some of them, so far) for the fundies in Fort Lauderdale but not one day earlier for Univisión in Miami ...

As Pam over at Pandagon notes, "which is worse for these guys — appearing and choking on their hypocrisy, or not showing up, thumbing their noses at the Base?"

For my part, I can't decide whether to watch the debate or protest outside ... decisions, decisions ...

Today's Daily Schadenfreude: Jim Naugle

There are a few things in life that make me truly happy. Spending time with my kids, for instance. Buccaneer victories. A great cigar. And, of course, seeing a batshit crazy homophobic fundie moron like Jim Naugle get some comeuppance for being an asshole.

You remember Naugle, the mayor of Fort Lauderdale, whose anti-gay statements have made him a laughingstock among all rational people (which excludes, of course, the thirty-percenters who stubbornly believe that Drunky McStagger is the Bestest Preznit Ever!!1! and that the Earth is 6,000 years old).

Yesterday, the Broward County Tourism Development Council kicked Naugle in the nuts off their board:

He was to represent Fort Lauderdale on the Tourism Development Council until next spring, but now the city will have to choose someone else for county commissioners to appoint. The tourism board controls marketing of the county to tourists and conventions and includes the general managers of major hotels, Swap Shop owner Preston Henn and restaurateur Jack Jackson.

"I had hoped that this would die on its own, but Mayor Naugle continues to push his own agenda and that is having an increasing impact on our community," said County Commissioner Stacy Ritter, who proposed removing him. "He has continued to escalate his rhetoric, and we cannot be silent."

Naturally, Naugle, who nominally is a Democrat but of course we all know better, is standing firm ... keeping a stiff ... holding his own ... resolute in the face of opposition:

Naugle was unbowed by the county's rebuke and said commissioners removed him because they "feared a very vocal minority." He questioned why no commissioner had talked to him beforehand to hear why he has done what he's done.

"Sometimes the easiest thing to do when you don't want to hear something is to shoot the messenger, but that doesn't mean that there is not a problem out there that needs to be addressed," Naugle said.

The only problem that needs to be addressed, Mr. Mayor, is that you are a blight on the public perception of south Florida. Yes, it is your right as an American* to have opinions and even to voice them. But you shouldn't be surprised when the hate speech that you spew forth causes people to, you know, not like you, and even makes them not want to be around you.

In short, Mayor Naugle, if you want to advocate discrimination and hate, go do it on your own time and in your own name. Don't sully Broward County and south Florida with your bilious, self-righteous, uninformed bigotry. Oh, and by the way, in light of the Larry Craig and Bob Allen scandals and your unnatural, prurient obsession with gay sex and bathrooms, Mr. Mayor, you might want to be a little careful when you step into a stall from now on, you know what I mean? I wouldn't want to see any repressed urges ruin your good name ... just sayin' ...

So, congratulations once again, Jim Naugle, for getting kicked off the Tourism Board -- for the third time, today's Blast Off! Daily Schadenfreude is for you!

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* As of this writing, at least.

Today's Daily Schadenfreude: Jim Naugle

The well-publicized anti-gay comments of Fort Lauderdale asshole mayor Jim Naugle haven't had much of an effect on tourism, on which the city relies heavily.

"The Fort Lauderdale business community is strong enough to weather this," said David Paisley, with San Francisco-based Community Marketing Inc., which tracks gay tourism and marketing.

In the past month, Naugle has charged the city has a problem with gay sex in public restrooms, said gays are unhappy and contended the gay Stonewall Library should not be housed in a city building because its collection contains pornography.

In follow-up comments shortly before last week's demonstration against him, he said the county should stop marketing itself to gay tourists because of the high rate of HIV infections in the area.

Fort Lauderdale ranks as the most popular resort destination for gay tourists, ahead of both the Palm Springs and Napa Valley areas of California, according to Community Marketing's most recent travel survey. The area was sixth among overall leisure destinations.

Nicki Grossman, president of the Greater Fort Lauderdale Convention & Visitors Bureau, acknowledged angst among tourism-related businesses about the Naugle blowup, but she said there has been no effect.

But that's not to say there aren't other proto-humans out there who share Naugle's narrow-minded bigotry:

Jerry Newcombe, senior producer of the Coral Ridge Hour at Coral Ridge Presbyterian Church [in Fort Lauderdale], said Naugle's concerns about gay tourism, HIV and public sex should be taken seriously. He said out-of-town tourists could be returning home infected with HIV after having anonymous sex in Fort Lauderdale.

"Mayor Naugle is standing for common sense and decency," Newcombe said. "He is a profile in courage and I respect him a great deal for that."

Well, I think it's nice that Fort Lauderdale is open to all people -- not only sensible, open-minded people who appreciate diversity, but also batshit crazy fundie nutjobs like Newcombe and Naugle. Truly, where do you begin with the load of crap that Newcombe spewed?

Ultimately, though, it seems Naugle's protestations may well have precisely the opposite effect from what he wanted:

Richard Gray, owner of the gay Royal Palms resort off Fort Lauderdale's beach and a member of the county Tourist Development Council, said none of his guests have raised concerns about Naugle. Nor has he had any cancellations. He said publicity about Naugle could boost gay tourism.

"If anything," he said, "it will remind people that Fort Lauderdale is one of the gayest cities in the United States."

And that, more than anything else, is why today's Blast Off! Daily Schadenfreude is for you, Mayor Naugle! Congratulations on your second DS award! I'm sure it won't be the last, either ...

Abu G comes to America's Glans™

Yes, His Embattledness spoke to the National Organization of Black Law Enforcement Executives in Fort Lauderdale this morning.

Embattled U.S. Attorney General Alberto Gonzales made a trip to Fort Lauderdale Monday morning but steered clear of the controversy surrounding his recent congressional testimony in his speech to law enforcement officers.

Just days earlier, four U.S. senators asked an independent special prosecutor to look into perjury charges against Gonzales.

Instead, in his short speech to the National Organization of Black Law Enforcement Executives, Gonzales talked about federal efforts to curb violent crime, posing for photographs with law enforcement officers but taking no questions from reporters.

[...]

Gonzales received a warm reception in Fort Lauderdale, where he was asked to address the crowd of more than 300 law enforcement officers about six months ago.

"It's a safe haven out of Washington," said Elsie Scott, president of the Congressional Black Caucus. "It's a place where he can be comfortable and not be booed."

How much worse can it get when you're a Cabinet member who has to find a place where you won't be booed?

No word on whether Gonzales hooked up with Jim Naugle. I don't know whether they've ever met, but I'm sure they'd get along smashingly.

Today's Daily Schadenfreude: Jim Naugle

The heat is turning up under the seat of Fort Lauderdale's batshit crazy homophobic mayor, Jim Naugle. Only he doesn't seem to realize it yet ... like his hero, Drunky McStagger, he's deeply in denial.

About 40 people wearing yellow "Flush Naugle" T-shirts rallied outside City Hall on Tuesday, preface to a much larger rally planned there next week. In the skies above, an airplane dragged a banner demanding "Surrender Naugle" and advertising the Web site www.flushnaugle.org.

Naugle, who never was considered gay-friendly, touched off the controversy when he was quoted in the South Florida Sun-Sentinel this month saying he doesn't use the term "gay" because "they're unhappy" and claiming that the city has a problem with men using public restrooms for sex.

You might remember Naugle's remarks in this vein, as well as his reservations about establishing a gay-oriented library in the city. But I digress ...

Naugle's comments were just more in a long line of inflammatory rhetoric that embarrasses Fort Lauderdale, gay activists said Tuesday. They pointed to Naugle's comments last year that housing would be affordable if people worked more jobs rather than sitting on the couch drinking beer.

Other leaders in the community sought to let the public know that Naugle's views aren't shared by everyone.

Nicki Grossman, president of the Greater Fort Lauderdale Visitor and Convention Bureau, said gay and lesbian tourists spent an estimated $1 billion here last year. She said she has responded to about a dozen e-mails about Naugle's comments, telling people that Broward does welcome gays and long ago "rolled out the rainbow carpet" for their tourism business.

Mitch Caesar, chairman of the Broward County Democratic Party, sent Naugle a critical letter asking him to "refrain from such behavior in the future."

"The Democratic Party, to which you technically belong, has a long history of supporting all groups and your actions as mayor of Fort Lauderdale seem inappropriate," he wrote.

Yep, you read it right ... Naugle ostensibly is a Democrat. Look, I'm all for having a big tent, but this is ridiculous.

Then again, let's look on the bright side. Naugle may be a bigot, but he's also a douchebag:

Upstairs in City Hall, Naugle said no apologies are forthcoming. "Apologize for what?" he asked.

Naugle is term-limited and will be out of city office in 2009.

"I'm a plain-speaking individual," he said. "People have elected me because I tell it like it is. I've been elected eight times."

Soon after the mayor convened Tuesday night's meeting, gay activist Michael Albetta stood up and shouted: "Mayor, we ask you, the city of Fort Lauderdale, to resign!"

"Thank you, I'm not resigning," the mayor calmly responded.

Well, I believe I speak for hundreds of thousands of tolerant, normal south Floridians when I cordially invite you, Mayor Naugle, to fuck off and die. The wheels of kicking your ass to the curb are in motion, and I can think of nothing more fitting than to point at you and laugh heartily.

So, before you go, Mr. Mayor, please accept my congratulations, as today's Blast Off! Daily Schadenfreude is for you!

Naugle goes after gays again

There you go again, Jim.

As we saw here last week , Fort Lauderdale mayor Jim Naugle really has a stick up his ass regarding the gay community in his city. But, rather than just bend over and take it, he's speaking out. This time, he believes (or wishes?) that a gay-oriented library is just chock full of "hard-core pornography."

Naugle said the Stonewall Library, which bills itself as one of the nation's largest collections of gay and lesbian literature, may include "hard-core" pornographic material.

[...]

As for the library, Naugle said at Tuesday's commission meeting: "When I showed the materials to the city attorney, he said it was likely hard-core pornography. I feel troubled a city building would be housing materials with content we have arrested people for in the past."

He declined to specify the titles he was referring to.

And when he asked City Attorney Harry Stewart to speak up at the meeting, Stewart declined.

Heh ... the city attorney wouldn't even back up the mayor at the commission meeting.

So, let's see, the Stonewall Library may include pr0n. And Mayor Naugle may be a batshit crazy closet case with pedophilic tendencies.

I said may. It would be irresponsible not to speculate, don't you think?

Where the boys are?

The 1960 film Where the Boys Are gave moviegoers everywhere a taste of the not-so-innocent Spring Break scene in Fort Lauderdale. Ahead of its time in its allusions to pre-marital sex and drinking, it's probably even too risque for current Fort Lauderdale mayor Jim Naugle. He's only too willing to share his views on sex (among other things), which are definitely reminiscent of the '60s ... the 1860s, that is.

Naugle (right ... I mean far right) believes that a $250,000 "robotic toilet" will prevent "illegal sex." And by "illegal sex," he means -- and these are his words -- "a couple of men in there engaged in a sex act."

But that's not all he believes. He's a veritable living, breathing Neanderthal:

The robo-john the city might buy for $250,000 or more allows occupants to stay inside for only a short time before the door opens. Probably not enough time for "illegal sex," Naugle figures.

The restroom, already in use in Atlanta, Seattle and New York, also plays music and cleans the seat automatically.

"We're trying to provide a family environment where people can take their children who need to use the bathroom," he said, "without having to worry about a couple of men in there engaged in a sex act."

Though police say sex in restrooms is no longer a hot crime, the mayor thinks it is. He talked about the illicit sex recently in public meetings, in an interview and in e-mails to residents.

Naugle, not a stranger to public controversy, particularly on the issue of gays, said public restrooms are pickup places for "homosexuals. ... They're engaging in sex, anonymous sex, illegal sex."

The proposed location for the city's experimental automated toilet is the parking lot at Sebastian Street, at what many locals call the "gay beach." Naugle told the South Florida Sun-Sentinel that the intelligent commode's security features are vital at this location, which he called "the rainbow parking lot."

"The homosexual newspaper said it's the 'gay parking lot.' That's not me saying that," Naugle said in the interview, "that's what they said. I don't use the word 'gay.' I use the word 'homosexual.' Most of them aren't gay. They're unhappy."

Naugle doesn't single out gays for his noxious statements. He's an equal opportunity dickhead:

Naugle has been outspoken as a Christian and a social and political conservative.

When the Christian outreach event Beachfest came to town in 2003, he said anyone who had a problem with the city's official embrace of the religious festival "can move to Iraq."

He angered middle class residents last year when he said housing prices would be affordable if people worked more hours instead of sitting on the couch drinking beer. Earlier this year, he refused to sign a mayor's pact to reduce greenhouse gases. Naugle said global warming is not caused by humans and that the pact contained "hate-America stuff that the environmental wackos want in."

Excuse me, Fort Lauderdale, but when did you become a haven for intolerance? I graduated from high school in Broward County, and back then (the early 1980s) Fort Lauderdale was a mecca for Spring Breakers and vacationers of all persuasions. Even today, as I travel to Fort Lauderdale regularly, I don't see a city that would condone, much less vote for, a mouth-breathing, borderline insane bigot like Naugle. To paraphrase Brian Griffin, whose leg did he have to hump to get elected mayor around there?

Perhaps it's time to do another movie about Fort Lauderdale: Where the Lunatics Are. I can think of one scene that would have to be included ...

Fort Lauderdale mayor Jim Naugle looks on as Davie mayor Tom Truex greets Drunky McStagger at the start of a visit in May 2006.

UPDATE (10:52 am 8/6/07): I see the photo of Naugle with Drunky is no longer available. Bummer. If you Google Image search "Naugle Bush," you can see a smaller version, but apparently the City of Davie pulled it ... my fault, you think? Li'l ol' me? ;)

UPDATE (12:32 pm 8/29/07): Picture's back.