The obligatory blog post about bestiality

You know, it wouldn't be Blast Off! without at least one post every year or so about bestiality. And 2009 is no exception.

Last year, we discussed the famous Mossy Head goat-rape and marveled that bestiality still was not illegal in Florida. The thinking at the time was that reports of that incident and others would moo-ve the Florida Legislature to action. But, you know, "action" and "Florida Legislature" rarely go together, and so the anti-sex-with-animals provision got held up in committee.

Well, it's baa-ck again this year, but this time it looks like it might get to the Senate floor for a yea-or-neigh vote:

Florida is one of only 16 states that still permit bestiality -- a fact that animal-rights activist and Sunrise Sen. Nan Rich learned to her horror when a Panhandle man three years ago was suspected of accidentally asphyxiating a family goat that he held by the collar while engaged in a sex act.

"There's a tremendous correlation between sexually deviant behavior and crimes against children and crimes against animals," said Rich, a Sunrise Democrat. "This is long overdue. These are heinous crimes. And people belong in jail."

But the Mossy Head man suspected of assaulting Meg the goat was never charged, because law enforcement officials could never link him to the crime scene. The suspect was arrested in a separate goat-abducting months later, said Walton County Assistant State Attorney Walter Parker.

Rich's proposal was amended to target only those who derived or helped others derive "sexual gratification" from an animal. The amendment specified that conventional dog-judging contests and animal-husbandry practices are permissible.

That last provision tripped up Miami Democratic Sen. Larcenia Bullard.

"People are taking these animals as their husbands? What's husbandry?" she asked. Some senators stifled their laughter as Chairman Charlie Dean explained that husbandry is the rearing and caring of animals.

Bullard didn't get it.

"So that maybe was the reason the lady was so upset about that monkey?" Bullard asked, referring to a New York case where a woman's suburban chimpanzee went mad and was shot.

Ladies and gentlemen, your Florida Legislature in action ...

Anyway, the story is that bestiality had been illegal, but the statute later was ruled unconstitutionally broad. So they're taking another quack at the law again this year.

We can only hope that our lawmakers in Tallahassee finally declare bestiality illegal, oinks and for all. After all, the life you save ... may be your pet's.