Today's Daily Schadenfreude: Rush Limbaugh

This could only be bad news for my neighbor, Rush Limbaugh:

In response to the epidemic of opiate addiction, Purdue [Pharma] LP, the maker of Oxycontin, has developed a new version of the powerful painkiller that's "harder to abuse." According to an AP article, the government will soon be examining this new incarnation of the drug and evaluating the manufacturer's lofty claims. How could this drug be made "abuse-resistant?" Details, inside...

Oxycontin, essentially a synthetic opiate, was developed in 1996 and hailed as a breakthrough in painkillers. It was designed to be swallowed and digested over a period of 12 hours in order to keep a steady flow of medication available to pain sufferers. It wasn't long before abusers discovered they could achieve a heroin-like high if the pills were crushed and snorted or prepared into an injectable solution.

The DEA found that the deaths from this class of drugs quintupled by 2001. Amidst the growing number of lawsuits and pressure by the FDA, Purdue Pharma developed an abuse-resistant version of the drug. The company has developed a plastic-like coating that is fused to the tablet making it difficult to crush. The coating is also designed to transform the pill into a "gelatinous mess" if the user tries to prepare it for injection. Purdue Pharma says the new pill dissolves just as effectively as the current pill when used properly.

Oh, dear. What's a stupid, self-aggrandizing right-wing blowhard drug addict to do?

Perhaps the Dominican pool boy will be replaced. Don't worry, though, Rush. I hear Colombia is lovely this time of year ...