For rise in teen pregnancy, thank the Bush crime syndicate

I really haven't been following that Gloucester, Mass., 17-pregnancies-in-the-high-school story very closely. However, a column by the Miami Herald's Leonard Pitts today reminds me -- and all of us, hopefully -- that whether or not the "pregnancy pact" is fact or fiction, the profound increase in teen sexuality and pregnancy in recent years can be attributed to one key catalyst: abstinence-only education, as championed by the GOP nannies in power and the Chief Nanny himself, Drunky McStagger.

The Gloucester story unfolds in the context of troubling recent news about teen sexuality. In March, a federal study reported that one in four American girls between the ages of 14 and 19 -- and nearly half of all African-American girls in that same age range -- are infected with at least one of four sexually transmitted diseases: human papillomavirus, chlamydia, genital herpes and trichomoniasis. In June, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reported that a steep decline in teen sexual activity through the 1990s leveled off between 2001 and 2007. And after years of decline, the teen birth rate rose by 3 percent between 2005 and 2006.

Some will seek to blame this disturbing news on Juno or Jamie Lynn Spears, but the trends predate both. They do not, however, predate the Bush administration's abstinence-only policy, which requires that any groups or states receiving federal funds for pregnancy prevention not discuss contraception and must teach that sex outside marriage will lead to harmful psychological and physical effects. In other words, they cannot talk about sex or help children who do have sex to protect themselves. They can only tell them to say no. Who can argue against saying no? What parent isn't pro abstinence? But abstinence only? Anyone who thinks a teenager will never do a thing because she has been forbidden has never met a teenager. Common sense -- and a 2007 study by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy -- tell us abstinence-only does not work. But since when does President Bush let common sense and fact trump ideology?

Gloucester is an aberration, but it might be an omen, too. And if it is, if these troubling numbers prove the leading edge of a new teen baby boom, we will have to answer many tough questions, but one won't be tough at all.

We already know where it started. We already know who the father is.

There's an old joke that has to do with George Washington being the literal "father of his country" (although he has no direct descendants). Apparently the current George holding the office of president doesn't limit his literal readings to the Bible, either.

Today's Daily Schadenfreude: Bill O'Reilly

This is great ... the master of the wankosphere, the titan of the talking points, Bill O'Reilly, had his ass handed to him by a high school student.

Let's go to the video:



The background on the whole situation is here, from the Daily Camera of Boulder, Colo. I guess because they're teaching sex education that's not all about abstinence, then it's okay for Bill to lose his shit on national TV and call a kid a "pinhead." Nice. Sounds "fair and balanced" to me.

Grab a falafel, Bill, and while you do, please accept my congratulations: today's Blast Off! Daily Schadenfreude is for you!

Today's Daily Schadenfreude: George W. Bush

It's always a treat when you can laugh at the misfortune of Drunky McStagger himself. And today is even better, because there are two, two, two reasons to laugh and point at The Deciderer today.

First, it seems that the value of a picture with Drunky has declined just a tad:

Gas prices may be up, but there's something that's apparently a little cheaper these days: A photo with President Bush. Yesterday, Bush headlined a fundraiser for the New Jersey state GOP, where donors could pay $5,000 to pose for a photo with the Commander in Chief. Expensive photo op, right? Well, that's actually cheaper that what donors paid just a year ago for a grip and grin with Bush. Last summer, GOP officials around the country charged at least $10,000 a pop for presidential photo op, a bargain compared to the $25,000-a-flash Bush commanded during some Republican National Committee fund-raisers back in 2000 and 2004.

At this rate, next year Drunky will be paying you to have your picture taken with him. (He couldn't pay me enough ... but I digress.)

Meanwhile, Jenna Bush (a/k/a NotJenna's Sister or The Other Drunk One) is releasing a book. That's right, apparently there's one descendant of Poppy and Bar who can read and write (but this is probably the only one).

Jenna writes precious little about herself, as her book, Ana's Story: A Journey of Hope (right), chronicles the life of an orphan Jenna encountered during her work with UNICEF in Latin America. It's aimed at teens, so I guess you can think of it as, say, Are You There, God? It's Me, Margaret, but with unprotected sex, AIDS, and teen pregnancy. Or something like that.

Anyway, the schadenfreude for Drunky comes from one of the messages of Jenna's (or is it NotJenna's?) book:

With such an earnest subject, Ms. Bush has done well to deflect criticism from those who might point out that her prose—comparing Ana's life to a song, for example ("To me her words and her life are like a song—a song of hope and resiliance. I met with Ana for more than six months and listened to the melody and lyrics of her life."), or the complete and utter lack of any details of place or setting—is, well, not particularly good. And while Ana's message—abuse is bad, AIDS is a reality—seems obvious to the point of stupidity, the book's pro-condom/pro-education message is a kamikaze-like leap from Daddy's nest.

"Daddy's nest," of course, promotes abstinence and forbids the distribution of condoms as well as financial aid to foreign agencies that provide abortions.

So, Drunky, how does it feel? Your presidency is a laughingstock and a failure of historic proportions, and even your own daughter (one or the other of them, anyway) doesn't buy your abstinence-only shtick. And so I take great pleasure in congratulating you, "Mr. President" -- today's Blast Off! Daily Schadenfreude is for you!