Waiter! A round of schadenfreude for everyone!

This already is all over the blogosphere, I know, but you know my proclivity for schadenfreude. I can't even make this a "Daily Schadenfreude," because it's just too big.

ABC News’ Brian Ross revealed tonight that the list of customers of an alleged Washington-based prostitution service includes White House and Pentagon officials as well as prominent attorneys.

“There are thousands of names, tens of thousands of phone numbers,” Ross said. “And there are people there at the Pentagon, lobbyists, others at the White House, prominent lawyers — a long, long list.” Ross added that the women who worked for the service, potentially as prostitutes, “include university professors, legal secretaries, scientists, military officers.”

On Friday, Ross broke the news that U.S. Deputy Secretary of State Randall Tobias had frequented the escort service. Ross added new details to that story tonight, recounting how he asked Tobias in a telephone interview “if he knew any of the young women, their names. He said he didn’t remember them at all. He said it was like ordering pizza.”

Typical Republic asshole. Picking up women is like ordering pizza. Goddamn, what a colossal fuckstick that guy is ... but again, typical Republic.

The purest form of schadenfreude, in my opinion, comes from delighting in the downfall of hypocrites. And the biggest hypocrites are family values Republics, which I'm betting will comprise 85% or more of the List.

Make yourself comfortable. It's going to be a schadenfreude summer, kids. Pass the popcorn.

(h/t to Atrios -- as though he needs one ...)

Today's Daily Schadenfreude: Randall Tobias

Who?

You mean the Randall Tobias (left) who was in charge of the Bush crime syndicate's foreign aid programs?

Yep, that's the one. Nice combover, Randy. You use spit on your comb?

Methinks he had a different definition of "foreign aid" ...

Tobias submitted his resignation a day after he was interviewed by ABC News for an upcoming program about an alleged prostitution service run by the so-called D.C. Madam.

ABC reported on its Web site late Friday that Tobias confirmed that he had called the Pamela Martin and Associates escort service to have women come to his condo and give him massages. More recently, Tobias told the network, he has been using a service with Central American women.

Tobias, 65, who is married, told ABC there had been "no sex" during the women's visits to his condo.

An aside: I always wondered what Pamela Sue Martin (right) had been doing since "The Nancy Drew Mysteries."* But I digress ...

Tobias' actual title was Director of U.S. Foreign Assistance and U.S. Agency for International Development Administrator, in which capacity he reported to Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice. According to the article, "[h]is rank was equivalent to deputy secretary of state."

On Wednesday, Tobias attended a luncheon at the State Department with Undersecretary of State Karen Hughes and actress Angelina Jolie, who was in Washington pushing for more U.S. education aid for developing countries.

"Psst ... Angie ... you doing anything after the luncheon? I've got some 'foreign aid' you can give, if you know what I mean ..."

It's so refreshing to see bad things happen to bad people. And as far as I'm concerned, anyone who aligns him- or herself with the Bush crime syndicate is a bad person. So, congratulations to Randall Tobias -- today's Blast Off! Daily Schadenfreude is for you!

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* I keed, I keed ... Ms. Martin is a lovely woman, on whom I've had a crush since 1974. I would never cast aspersions on her character. Cross my heart. Now bring that flashlight and come sit by me, Pam ...