Opening today at a theatre near you: "Wingnut Wankfest"

According to the ads that have been blanketing my radio of late, there's a right-wing "comedy" movie opening today called "An American Carol." The radio ads tout that "[since] right-wing movies are almost illegal in Hollywood, [the movie's stars,] Kevin Farley, Kelsey Grammer, Trace Adkins, Jon Voight, and Dennis Hopper are practically criminals." Well, if it's a crime to appear in a film that threatens to be bad on a colossal, historical level, then yeah, they're criminals all right.

Obviously, the cast reads like a Who's Who of wingnut actors, and the director, David Zucker of Airplane! and Naked Gun fame, has said part of his motivation for making the film is that he's fed up with Christian-bashing, and especially Catholic-bashing, in popular culture ... although he's Jewish.

It's instructive to note that the film was never screened for critics. Typically, when that happens, it means the movie is destined for the $5.99 DVD bin at Wal-Mart within weeks ... and I'm sure this one is no exception.

No, I haven't seen the movie, and I don't plan to do so. I'm still recovering from last night's Sarah Palin Comedy Hour, so why would I want to subject myself to more crazed wingnut "humor?"

The fact is, I don't have to see the movie to know that it sucks because, as I've pointed out before numerous times, Republicans aren't funny. Period. There's no two ways about it. Republicans don't understand humor, they can't tell jokes -- when they try, they're usually racist or sexist and uniformly unfunny -- and their attempts at mass media comedy have been nothing short of execrable.

As for Carol itself, trust me -- I've seen the trailer -- this film blows goats (I have proof). The plot relies on a "Christmas Carol"-like motif, as a character who is a parody of Michael Moore leads a movement to abolish the Independence Day holiday but is "visited by three ghosts who try to change his perception of the country," according to IMDB. It's going to be just as abysmal as it sounds, so run! -- don't walk! -- away from any theatre showing this inevitable turd this weekend.

It's sad, really ... I remember when Dennis Hopper was cool ...