Blowin' Bob Allen stirs up a storm in Tallahassee

Ah, the fun with Brevard County's own "legisfellator," Blowin' Bob Allen (R-Merritt Island), never ends.

Now Florida House Speaker Marco Rubio is "disturb[ed]."

''The recent release of Rep. Bob Allen's post-arrest statements injects a new and very disturbing element to an already troubling incident,'' Rubio, R-West Miami, said in a statement issued from Boston, where he is attending a national meeting of state legislators.

Rubio said the House will continue gathering information but reserve any action until it has all the facts.

The Orlando-based Florida Civil Rights Association has called for Allen, also a co-chairman of Republican presidential candidate John McCain's Florida campaign, to resign from the Legislature because his comments to Titusville police were "racially insensitive."

An audiotape indicates he told Assistant Police Chief John Lau that he felt intimidated by a "stocky black guy" in the park's restroom and thought the man, an undercover officer, and other "stocky black guys" were going to rob him.

Allen told Lau the officer first mentioned oral sex for money and that he simply went along with discussing the transaction to avoid becoming a "statistic."

Of course, what Speaker Rubio doesn't understand is that being "racially insensitive" is a positive trait among Brevard's batshit crazy wingnuts. Hell, if he were smart enough, I'd say Blowin' Bob concocted that "stocky black guy" story as a way to pander to his constituents; he didn't really believe it, but he knew his mouth-breathing, moronic supporters would lap it up.

(Hmmm ... maybe "lap it up" is the wrong terminology to use here ...)

Anyway, it's obvious that Blowin' Bob is nowhere near smart enough to think that far ahead. In his bizarre worldview, it's better to be a racist than a closeted homosexual. And, indeed, he probably thinks that the Brevard electorate that sent him to Tallahassee shares that twisted point of view:

Police Cpl. Erich Barrett wrote in a supplemental report that when Allen was being placed in his cruiser at the park the lawmaker asked, "I don't suppose it would help if I said I was a state legislator, would it?" Barrett wrote that he told him, "No."

Allen has said he will not resign and may still run for the Florida Senate next year.

Then again, maybe he knows his constituency better than I do.

Oh, please run, Blowin' Bob. Please run for the Senate. Can you imagine the blogging snark we could generate from that? pleaserunpleaserunpleaserun ...