Today's Daily Schadenfreude: Dick "Dick" Cheney and Rep. Jack "Dick" Kingston (R-Ga.)

Proving that choosing a winner of the coveted "Daily Schadenfreude" award is becoming akin to shooting fish in a barrel, today for the first time, we have co-recipients.

The first honoree is another obvious, yet richly deserving choice. Dick "Dick" Cheney, puppetmaster, is snarling with just a little bit more feeling today, as the news became public that his openly gay daughter Mary is pregnant.

News of the pregnancy will undoubtedly reignite the debate about gay marriage. During the campaign, Mary Cheney was criticized by gay activists for not being more publicly supportive of same-sex marriage. Her father said people "ought to be free to enter into any kind of relationship they want to" but deferred to the president's policy supporting a constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriages. Cheney herself called the proposed amendment "a gross affront to gays and lesbians everywhere" in her book, "Now It's My Turn: A Daughter's Chronicle of Political Life," which was published in May.

Cheney has described her relationship with Poe -- whom she took to last year's White House dinner honoring Prince Charles and Camilla -- as a marriage. The two met in 1988 while playing ice hockey and began dating four years later. They moved from Colorado to Virginia a year ago to be closer to Cheney's family. In an interview with the Post six months ago, when asked if she and Poe wanted children, Cheney said that was a "conversation I think I should have with Heather first."

Oh, dear, just when things were looking up for "Dick," this happens. What's a despot to do?

Moving on to our second recipient ...

Tongues have been wagging on Capitol Hill (nope, not Mark Foley's anymore) after incoming House Majority Leader Steny Hoyer's (D-Md.) announcement that members should expect a longer work week ... longer, that is, than three days.

For his utterly ridiculous and ignorant response, a share of today's "Daily Schadenfreude" goes to Rep. Jack Kingston (R-Ga.), who said:

"Keeping us up here eats away at families," said Rep. Jack Kingston (R-Ga.), who typically flies home on Thursdays and returns to Washington on Tuesdays. "Marriages suffer. The Democrats could care less about families -- that's what this says."

Jesus H. Smack-Flappity Tap Dancing Christ! What mutant strain of stupid do you have to be to first, blame a longer (i.e., more like the rest of America, including the folks who put you into office, Jack) work week on Democrats' disregard for families, and second, complain about possibly having to work more than three days?

Three short words fondly attributed to your fellow honoree, Jack, should sum up my feelings on this: Go fuck yourself.

So, congratulations to evil overlord Dick "Dick" Cheney and Rep. Jack Kingston (R-Fantasyland) ... today's Blast Off! Daily Schadenfreude is for you!